My bedtime books of choice at the moment are the autobiography in 6 parts of Maya Angelou. I have railed and shouted, been frustrated and amazed at what she has done in her life. The early books are about her childhood and her early adult years. It's the early adult years that made me angry at first, then it was the 30 year old woman that frustrated me. And then it dawned on me, we don't just appear on this earth as fully rounded all knowing beings, with compassion and love for all, we get there by jumping head first, marrying the wrong men, having babies too young and making all the mistakes that eventually go to make up the person who stands before us today. This is exactly what I say to others about my own daughters, when their hearts have been broken or they told me they were expecting babies at the age I was when I said the same to my Mother, I ask people to step back and think. I have been allowed to make mistakes in my life, as is my right. My life is mine to command, it is mine to make a success or a pigs ear of. I got where I am today by making mistakes and by having people around me who recognised that it was just a blip, I would learn and grown and develop because of it. I might not have learned and grown immediately, I might have made the same mistake again and again, but eventually I learned, I was wiser and I blossomed. The key to Personal Growth is to be allowed to make mistakes and having someone near who can soften the blow,. I'm not talking about rescuing you or bailing you out. I'm talking about having an understanding ear and saying that it's ok to mess up. With our babies and toddlers we watch then learn to crawl and walk and talk and do all the amazing things a human can do. We don't do this by telling them they are wrong and doing it for them, we do this by encouraging words and by kissing away the bruised pride so that they try again when they are ready. My thought for you today is lets do this for our young women. Let's encourage and nurture them Let them lead their own lives, let them make mistakes and always be there to listen and advise but do not under any circumstances do it for them, let them find their own way. |
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