My Mum came to visit on Saturday, nothing unusual in that, although it's the first time she's driven here since her hip replacement, so a little unusual I suppose. Whilst chatting and catching up she asked me how I was, and as much to my surprise as to hers I burst into tears. I've spent the past two months, well actually the past 5 months running from project to project, and filling my life with all the activities I think I need to make our home life happy and successful. As a result whenever anyone has asked me to help with a problem they are having or needed me to listen to their woes I've felt as if they've placed a ten tonne weight on my shoulders and that I'm buckling under the strain. It was only talking to Mum that made me realise how tired I felt, not physically but emotionally. I have been so desperate to make home a success I have ignored everything outside of our home. This, as my friends and family will tell you is not like me. I am usually the person people can turn to and rely on if they need help or advice. But my inward focus has meant that I've pushed all that aside. The thing is helping others is part of my nature, it's part of what makes me who I am, and as a result by ignoring it I have felt lost and unhappy. So my pledge today is to get back to me, I'm going to listen and help, that doesn't mean I need to get mixed up in someone elses emotional baggage but it does mean I can help them reach their true potential by being available when called on. The key to helping others is to know when you have to say know, not to completely ignore any requests. So breathe in, breathe out, relax and listen...bring on today |
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